Dating question for woman
I pulled these questions from a checklist in my book, where I include three entire chapters to hands-on checklists and inventories about your love life. What are the three most important characteristics to look for in a partner?
Men and women have the hardest time with this issue, as they’re usually too focused on sex appeal and personality ‘sparks,’ and focusing too little on the factors that actually matter the most.
What is the primary purpose of a romantic relationship?
It took many years of studying psychology and working with clients to get to the bottom of this one.
I also don't think the spark he speaks of *has* to be bad, but he is certainly right that it makes someone more vulnerable, more likely to make bad relational choices.
I remember one guy I had so much chemistry with in college that all of our professors assumed we were a major item, but I knew I simply could not let myself so much as linger in a hug w/ him b/c the physical and intellectual spark was in danger of blinding me to some irreconcilable divergent paths.
Emphasizing that definition of emotional stability is, I think, important among churched people, since in some of the Christian circles I have been and am a part of we often idealize an inappropriate self-sufficiency as the person who is "in faith" and faithful (and really that just creates unsafe people).
Next, give your partner some time to change, and this may take some time —a matter of months.
You need to decide the time frame that is acceptable to you, and then wait.
In other words, you should feel the same intensity of spark with a new friend that you feel with a new romantic interest!
Ultimately, asking yourself these five questions can make an enormous difference in your future relationships.
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